We talk a lot about choosing our people. Choose wisely. Show up. Make the effort. Make room. Love people well. And yes. All of that matters. But there’s another side of relationship that matters just as much: being chosen. Because we can choose someone deeply and still spend a lot of time trying to figure out where we “fit”in their life. When what we are really longing for is simply belonging. And fitting in isn’t quite the same as belonging. When we’re trying to fit in, we can find ourselves changing who we are to match the environment where we’re trying to find acceptance. We adjust. We read the room. We figure out what works here and what doesn’t. Sometimes, without even realizing it, we begin changing the shape of who we are just to have a place. **Belonging will not require us to change the shape of who we are in order to be acceptable. ** Healthy connection needs room for both choosing and being chosen. For giving and receiving. For making room for others and experiencing what it feels like when someone makes room for us. We won’t always show up equally. Relationships have seasons. Capacity changes. Life gets messy. But belonging shouldn’t require us to continually earn our place by changing our core identity. So we choose. And we notice where we are chosen. We make room. And we notice where room is made for us. We can spend a lifetime learning how to fit ourselves into spaces that require us to become smaller, quieter, easier, or different. Maybe the work isn’t becoming better at fitting in. Maybe it’s learning to recognize where we don’t have to change our shape to belong. 🤍 #RelationshipRecovery #HealthyRelationships #Belonging #BeingChosen #ChooseWell RelationalHealth HealthyConnection FriendshipMatters AdultFriendships RelationshipCoaching RelationshipHealing EmotionalHealth AuthenticConnection KnowYourWorth AmieKielwasserCoaching

We sometimes see beauty in the things that aren’t real and that ask nothing of us. And we miss the beauty in the things that are real because they ask more of us. That doesn’t make them wrong. It just means they’re alive. #AmieKielwasserCoaching #PersonalGrowth #EmotionalGrowth #HealingJourney #InnerWork SelfAwareness IntentionalLiving HealthyConnection RelationshipRecovery LifeCoaching TendWhatMatters WhatWeNurture AliveAndGrowing GrowthThroughHealing RealThingsRequireCare

This tree….. I witnessed firsthand the joy and delight this tree brings to the people who find it along their path. The laughter, the children climbing its branches, the memories made around it…..priceless. But when I look at this tree, I don’t just see something beautiful, old and majestic. I see struggle, determination and resilience. I see roots that had to bend and stretch around obstacles just to find what they needed. And then I think about the seed it grew from…… Did that little seed know it landed somewhere growth would be difficult? Did it know there were places with deeper soil, fewer obstacles and more protection? I don’t think it did. I think the seed simply knew to grow…..whatever that took. And I think most of us have been that seed at some point. We didn’t choose all the conditions we were planted in. Sometimes we had to bend, stretch, reach farther and hold on tighter just to find nourishment. Not because the difficult ground was good, but because there was life inside of us that kept reaching for life. And look at this tree now. There’s evidence of its life far beyond the tree itself. People have found joy beneath its branches. Families have made memories there. That little seed could have never known how far the evidence of its life would reach. Maybe we don’t either. Maybe our resilience becomes a place where someone else finds a little shade, a little joy, a little hope…..or realizes they can grow too. All because a little seed landed in some pretty unfavorable conditions…… and grew anyway.

Join us on Facebook tonight!!! We want to talk to YOU!! If you don’t follow us there….. https://www.facebook.com/share/1MTZ5oS6Pp/?mibextid=wwXIfr